dear,
i knew you could be bought because everyone told me so.but i was not told that i might fall in love with you.but how could anyone would have told me about that as you are the mistress of all the men and master of the rest.i thought i was different but i was wrong.i held the belief for a long time that i could resist the charm you hold.i could defy your beauty,i could deny your pleasures but the lux of your beauty was enough for me to love you.you surrounded me and seduced me at the time when i was the strongest to resist you.But you knew my weakness and how i romanced with it and you tore all my defenses down just like shimmering sword cuts through the silk.You had me then an there and i though why did i even try to even resist you.You were the best, you provided warmth,your touch took away the isolation i had been living in.Oh yes i was one of those who adored you and couldn't live without you as you were slowly becoming the cool around me when i thought i needed it most ,yes you had me when i "thought".
Why couldn't you leave me alone.I thoughtI loved you .You know that better than anyone else but you love me for what i'am not,for something you want me to be.i enjoyed the euphoria when i was around you but you will spoil me and melt me into another of your trophies.
You were there to use me and give me false hope and sense of security which i never seeked ,to demonstrate your power over me and embarrass me, that anyone who boasts about his power over your beauty will be crushed.but you are not what i seek.you are not what i adore,you are not what i fancied,you are not who i love.The one i love lives on a landscape far far away.I love someone who is so beautiful that voices fall apart when we try to speak.I will fall short of words even today to describe my love for her.As you could never describe what you love, you can live in it, you can feel it.the warmth of the girl i love i've felt ,yes in my dreams ,yes those are the dreams my kind never forgets because she knows i want her even though i was comforting with you .she knows i deserve best .she knows that you are a prostitute who tricks people to her bed for everything they have got,she knows you close their eyes so they cant see what they are missing.that is why she comes to people like us in in our dreams for we go through half our lives with our eyes closed only realizing we have been stripped of everything we ever had. To pay for your pleasures.I don't love you ,i hate you and i resent you .i hate you enough to change you but that is a task of two for it can only be done when i meet the one I truly love.maybe then i might start even loving you too.I don't know what to call you now but since the beginning of the time there is only one appropriate and a dignified name you had so i will call you by that name only "the society".
your well wisher,
a changed person
p.s.:no ps this time.
